Calming Heated Situations

When emotions run high, logic fades. De-escalation restores productive dialogue.

Immediate Tactics:

• Stay calm yourself
• Give space
• Lower your voice
• Slow down
• Acknowledge emotions
• Listen fully
• Use their name
• Take breaks if needed

What NOT to Do:

• Don’t say 'Calm down'
• Don’t minimize feelings
• Don’t defend immediately
• Don’t match intensity

Active Listening:

• Reflect content and feelings
• Ask open questions
• Summarize

SAFER Model:

• Space
• Acknowledge
• Facilitate
• Encourage
• Recover

Managing Yourself:

• Notice your reactions
• Breathe deeply
• Pause before responding
• Stay goal-focused

Special Scenarios:

• Yelling → stay quiet, set boundaries
• Silence → give space, suggest alternate formats
• Personal attacks → acknowledge feelings, redirect, end if necessary